


Be my escape

by ginwife



Category: Gintama
Genre: Family Bonding, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-War, Recovery, Suicidal Thoughts, Yorozuya Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-06
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:15:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25076740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ginwife/pseuds/ginwife
Summary: In which Gintoki realizes what is right in front of him. Inspired by Be My Escape by Reliant K
Relationships: Kagura & Sakata Gintoki & Shimura Shinpachi
Kudos: 47





	Be my escape

Gintoki did not know that a certain incident involving a klutz cashier and a tiger would somehow end up permanently being apart of him. Not to forget that parfait, that stupid ass parfait. If it was not for that delicious, sweet, delectable parfait that his doctor told him he had to limit the amount of (damn that fucking doctor!) Sakata-san would not have ended up with the pain of an ass glasses kid. Sure he was annoying, but at that time, there was not much going on with him, either. Well, other than some kind of business he did not have verification for. 

About that business... it really didn't blast off, not that he expected it to. A successful business did not mean anything to him, as long as he was able to get by. But, ever since Shinpachi decided to be apart of the pathetic little thing he called "Yorozuya", the money started doing a little better. Not enough to pay rent, but enough to bet a little more on Pachinko because hey, you only live once! And possibly, even after a little China girl came along, there was even enough money to splurge on a hotpot, or even a reservation at that Korean Barbecue. And as Gintoki sits there, watching the gluttonous Chinese girl hog up that precious meat, and Shinpachi blowing on some of it with his chopsticks, the hotness of it steaming up his glasses, he wondered how he ended up carrying that burden his old war friend talked about. Him carrying the weight of loving someone again, but it was all worth it to see their eyes glisten when you tell them that there was a new episode of their new television show. As well as those same eyes that he saw after his encounter with the Benizakura sword. He worried them sick, which is something he will continue to do.

As life had gone on, Gintoki realized that his nightmares have simmered down immensely. The waking up sweating, drained and shaking, would bring him back to the war he had once fought in. Every time he had awoken, the emotions had brought him right back to when his face was blood splattered, his clothes were torn, and he red eyes have seen no more that he could have handled. Of course, some things do not go away. The nightmares still occurred, but after jolting up awake, instead of the canons he would hallucinate, he would hear the small ruffle on a closet opening where Kagura had slept. She would have hazy, tired eyes, her hair in multiple directions. She would crawl out and there was a certain conclusion they would both face when they looked at each other. Gintoki suspected she did not know, or at least was not able to fully understand the pain Gintoki would experience about every night. 

For such a young child, she was mature with what she done. She did not speak a word, as if she silently shared the pain with him. As she herself had experienced something herself, or maybe leaving her only known family after witnessing something she could not handle, and being tired of hearing the sound of rain on her umbrella. The only words muttered that night was Gintoki apologizing for hitting her with his scooter, and even then, those were the only words he managed to say, and it was not even the full truth. 

Gintoki did not mind sharing a bed with someone for one night. 

But then the nightmares will only occur once every two days, then once a week, then once a month, until they rarely occurred. But if they did, Gintoki would know he would have some sort of comfort, an escape.

And as Gintoki would feel the breeze of the wind on his scooter with Shinpachi clinging on him, he could feel his wondrous eyes lay heavily on him. Only for those eyes to close when on the rooftop of Odd Jobs. His headphones on as he fell asleep soundly under the night sky, with his favorite Otsuu-chan song playing. 

Gintoki, the Shiroyasha, realized that his scars would never go away. On his heart, on his body, on his soul. But these two damn kids will tend to them every day, even on the imperfect days, even on the worst days where he feels himself back where he was those years ago. And in return he would tend to theirs. This is when he decided to live by his own code. He will live without second thought about it, because this damn world he saw 15 years ago is more beautiful than what he had perceived. And he decided to live. To live. Live. To live until he died. 

So maybe another parfait wouldn't hurt.

**Author's Note:**

> I honestly never thought I would be writing fanfiction again, it has been around 3 years!  
> But of course, Gintama forced me to write this (and alot of other things to, but thats a longer story)  
> Anyways, I promise I wont write alot of stuff like this, this touches on the darker aspects, i will write some fluff sooner or later, i just wanted to write how Gintoki was pulled out of the dark around the beginning of the series (i just.... love him so much)
> 
> But damn, I love the yorozuya so much. god these three idiots are on my mind 24/7. fuck.


End file.
